Sex With Ghosts

Jenn’s Para-Normal Orgasm

This column first appeared @ E-Crap on August 23, 2003

I had sex with a ghost.

It happened a few weeks ago, during a hot, steamy night in my home on the eastern seaboard. For whatever reason, I decided against air conditioning on this hotter-than-thou evening. I retired to the friendly confines of my four-post bed around midnight, deciding to savor whatever breeze I could harness by opening my side window. I generally hate air conditioning, and almost always prefer fresh air. Even when driving. In my bedroom, I have added incentive to open the windows at night, namely my wind chimes hanging from the frame. Each breeze brings a different, soothing melody, and makes the process of falling asleep that much more enjoyable.

But the night in question was different. After lying awake for several minutes, the chimes began dancing, and emanating continuous sounds, like a constant melody. I listened intently, but felt no breeze. The curtains danced, and the melody played. I went as far as to get up and stand in front of the window to feel the breeze, but there was none. And without the breeze, the chimes continued to play, and the curtains continued to sway.

And then it happened. I returned to the bed, and I felt him. I wasn’t asleep, and I wasn’t awake, but I felt him there with me. He was all around me. I suddenly felt a breeze on my neck, and my legs, and then a swirling of breeze over my entire naked body. I began writhing on the bed, and at that moment, I needed to have sex. Gyrating my hips, I began to spread my legs, knowing full well that I was alone. Slowly, I reached my fingers toward my most private of areas, but before that, I began feeling stimulation. I felt it on my breasts, and then between my legs. And before I could begin pleasuring myself, I was indeed being pleasured by someone (or something) else. My arms were pinned to my headboard, and I continued to writhe, feeling the penetration and raising my hips to sense every last move. What followed was a massive climax, and a lot of doubt about what happened. I remember waking up at about 4AM, with soaked sheets and little more memory of what transpired than what I just wrote. The room was hotter than before, and the chimes had stopped dancing. I rose again, this time closing the window and turning on the air conditioning. Sexually satisfied, I fell asleep within minutes.

The next morning, I was glowing. I felt vibrant, and ready for the day. After all, I was sexually appeased the night before. The only question remaining was who appeased me? Was it my own fingers, a dream, or a ghost? While I believe in some para-normal things, I’ve never been a big believer in ghosts. I even try to avoid most ghost movies. But this was different. Something supernatural might have happened that night, and I needed to explore it a bit further. As I usually do, I turned to the Internet to do research on amorous ghosts. I found little. It seems there are few people who want to share their sexual experiences with ghosts. I did find a good deal of posting on the subject throughout message boards, and the general feeling was that any sex with ghosts was actually sex with a "poltergeist." The definition of a poltergeist according to is…

German word meaning "noisy or troublesome spirit". Poltergeist activity may include unexplained noises, movements of objects, outbreaks of fire, floods, pricks or scratches to a person's body. Unlike hauntings, which are associated with specific locations, poltergeists typically focus on a person (the focal person or poltergeist agent) who is often a young child or adolescent. Many physical mediums experienced poltergeist activity in their childhood. adds that a poltergeist "…is applied to a variety of invisible entities which manifest in an unruly and disturbing manner, often involving unexplained noises, the moving or throwing of objects, vile smells, strange shrieks, as well as such curious phenomena as apports."

Undaunted, and unimpressed with what I had found, I came across an interview at with a man named Drew Sinton, who apparently is able to see ghosts. During the interview, the following questions and answers transpired:

Have you had sex with a ghost?

I haven't, but I've come into contact with people who claim they have.

Do they find it better than the living?

Yeah, they encourage sex with the dead.

Upon further web searches, I found a news story from June, 2001, about a woman from Ecuador who claims to have had sex with a ghost. These were many sites that published this news story, so instead of linking them, here is the transcript of the story.

Ecuadorian woman 'had sex with ghost'

An Ecuadorian woman has claimed that she had sex with a ghost.

The woman, known only as Karen, said the ghost slept with her on a number of occasions in her house in the southern city of Guayaquil. Karen said the visitations always occurred in the early hours of the morning, and only stopped when "it sensed that my fear was so strong that it left me alone".

"I felt his body on top of mine and I didn't know what to do. When I came to my senses, it disappeared without saying anything. I was covered in sweat and ran to the bathroom," Karen told her local newspaper Extra.

A few days later, the ghost returned again.

"Unlike in previous apparitions, I could see its gleaming eyes and bulky body. I thought I was dreaming but it was real. His body was as light as air," she said. The woman initially feared no one would believe her, but her mother encouraged her to come forward and say what she had experienced.

Although the local authorities are skeptical about the story, local residents support Karen's account.

"There are plenty of ghosts around here, so I wouldn't be surprised," one neighbor said.

Jenn Contacts a Ghost Expert

I still needed more convincing. One news story, and a few message board postings would not convince me. I needed proof, and I needed to turn to an expert. I remembered a Sex Crap reader and fellow journalist in Orlando, Michael Gavin, who owns a ghost tour business ( Who better to turn to in my hour of need, and to answer my questions.

Michael Gavin has been a member of Orlando's haunting community for many years. As the owner of Orlando Haunting Ghost Tours, he has experienced ghost happenings first-hand. He was more than willing to help me. Finally, my questions would be answered!

Jenn – Did I really have sex with a ghost?

MG – That is ultimately only a question you can answer. I am not so sure about the poltergeist angle, more and more I keep running across that theory that most poltergeist activity is a projection of the agents doing rather than a spirit. One colleague suggested the possibility of Astral Projection (someone among the living projecting themselves upon you). However, the details of your experience are pretty consistent with other accounts of the same nature. Whether this it is very vivid dream (or even self fulfillment of personal desires) or a true visitation by an amorous spirit it open to conjecture. The verification of spirit activity is in itself a realm that only ultimately be proven once one either crosses over themselves or has had a personal experience. Various methods have been utilized to measure and record suspected paranormal activity (see for examples and accounts) with varying degrees of success. In your experience you describe visual and tactile indications of activity. While you indicate that this was in semi-sleep state (which is where most of these kind of experiences occur - I believe that this when we are most relaxed and more open to/less afraid of the spirit realm), this does not invalidate what you felt and recall. Some would say this could be more of a psychosomatic experience, but your recollection of the event is quite vivid. There are questions that come to mind: Is this a recurring event? If so is there a consistency to the experience? Are there any other indications of a presence (say emotional or audible clues)? Has anyone else in the vicinity experienced similar occurrences?

Jenn – How common do you believe it is for humans to have sex with ghosts?

MG – It might be because of the repression of sexuality prevalent in this country that instances are not as common. As it is people are generally reluctant to discuss (let alone accept) non-sexual paranormal experiences. In the instance of a more intimate encounter, the embarrassment or fear of ridicule may be an even greater hindrance. There are quite a few documented cases of sex with the paranormal although. In my dealings over the past several years I have personally encountered at least three individuals who detail intimate experiences with unseen (but not unfelt) visitors. I do not think it is a common event however (especially given I have spoken to hundreds about their spirit stories).

Jenn – Can pregnancy occur after sex with a ghost?

MG - Since we are dealing with a non-corporal entity I do not think this probable or possible (except maybe in certain Anne Rice or Biblical accounts)

Jenn – Have you come across any ghost sexuality in Orlando, or anywhere else?

MG – I have had one personal experience where the person I was intimate with stated that I was being used and possessed by spirit familiar to her (that activity and interaction was abruptly and permanently discontinued). There are two cases that stand out. The first involved the roommate of an interviewed young lady (who, herself had been visited by what appeared to be a Native American male spirit). The roommate, male, claims to have been visited by a female Native American spirit who had sex with him. He describes the event as very vivid with an obvious completion. The second case involves a 42 year old woman who claims her home is an anchor for several spirits. She believes that an Incubus (not truly a ghost) resides in the mirror of her master bathroom. One evening she was awakened by her dog just in time to see something slink up from the floor towards her (a white shape is how I believe she described it). It exited the master bedroom in the direction of the guest bedroom next door. She assumed that this was the entity her mirror was harboring (based on the emotional impressions she went through). The amazing part of the story is that the next morning her roommate spun a tale of an intimate dreamlike encounter that same night.

Jenn – What should I do if this happens again?

MG – That depends a lot on your personal feelings towards the incident. If it is something you are open to, then proceed with caution (not to be an alarmist, but you may not be dealing with a ghost). In my discussion with colleagues regarding the case of the 42 year old, I was strongly advised that the line between spirit and living is one that should not be so blurred. Since spirits are essentially people without a body, the best way to deal with one is the same way you would with the living. If something bothers you tell it to stop. Do not hesitate to contact a trusted medium or spiritual expert if you feel this does not cause the activity to cease (if cessation is what you intend).

I want to thank Michael for his time, and trying to help me better understand these recent events. Make sure you check out his website at

So maybe I didn’t have sex with an actual ghost. Or perhaps I did. Have any of you out there had similar experiences you want to share? Might make a great follow-up column!

Jenn writes "Sex Crap" exclusively for Her column is syndicated to several top sites including (the online relationship magazine of, and (The Official Webcast of Modern Civilization).


Facebook Twitter YouTube